For today:
I must compliment myself on getting along with Leland well the last couple days. I think the different circumstances have allowed us to have things to talk about and we've taken advantage.
I would like not to get angry with people at work. Especially if they don't know my name, or other minor thing like that. I get angry at people I've hardly even talked to at all! How silly of me. I would like not to make prejudgements of those I do not know. I have no reason to think one way or the other about what they're doing. I would like to be able to act normally around women. I don't want to worship or hate them. I just want to treat them like human beings and not think of whether I want to date them or not based on my superficial impressions. They deserve respect. I feel the need to be angry at work, why? To get me through the day? God, grant me the serenity to be peaceful at work. Thanks for another day on this Earth. Peace.

INVENTORY

Things I wish I would do different:
I wish I wasn't so nervous about having to talk in front of others. My brain stops working - I feel tired and weak.
Today I was very nervous about having to instruct the people in my zone about how to count tags. As is 99% the case, the imaginings in my head were much worse than what actually happened. I want to be able to admit that I don't know how things are going to end up. I am not God, I cannot predict the future.
I don't communicate with Leland as well as I want. I want to say what is really on my mind. I want to stop worshiping women. I want to treat them like human beings, not objects. I want so badly to give up that feeling I have when I see one that is attractive. That feeling of "oh no, what do I do?" or "what will I say?" or "how can I impress this person". I just want to be myself and let God do the rest. God will do the rest!
I need to get a sponser, if only so I can do my fifth step. I really think it would be good for me. I need to go to meetings to find a decent candidate. The truth is I need to go more often than I want, but not more than I need. I want to feel good! I know I do when I go to meetings and work the steps. So why not?